stupid

You're so stupid, your mother told you to go buy a color television and
you asked, “What color?”

Men are like toilets -- either they're taken, or full of crap!

There was an old man named Bozo, and all he had was a female donkey.
One day he wins the lottery and gets $50,000. He doesn't know what to
do with his money, so he decides to spend a night in a five star hotel.
He asks for the finest room and starts going up the stairs with his
female donkey. The manager sees him and asks where he's going with his
donkey.

"Anywhere I go, she goes."

"I'm sorry, sir," said the manager, "but you can't take the donkey
upstairs. Leave it down here with us and we'll take good care of her."
So Bozo goes up to his room and opens the door. Everything is made of
gold, there is a table full of food, and a huge television. He doesn't
want to ruin anything so he takes his raggedy coat off and sleeps on
the floor. The next morning the manager comes up to the room and asks
how his night was.
''Great!'' replied Bozo. ''How much do I have to pay?'' he asks.

''One thousand dollars for the food.''

''But I haven't touched the food."

''It was right there, so you should have. Two thousand dollars for the TV."

''But I didn't even know how to turn the damn thing on!''

''It was there, so you should have. Five thousand for sleeping on the bed."

''But I slept on the floor!''

''It was there. Your total is eight thousand dollars."

''You owe me ten thousand dollars for screwing my donkey.''

''But sir, I didn't screw your donkey.''

''It was there. You should have!''